6:36 p.m

Hoooooly fuck (yeah, fuck the *fiddlesticks* thing for now...too full of emotion to censor myself)...

Today really pissed me off and did indeed show me that my 'best friends' really are not my best friends anymore...I don't think they do it on purpose, but you know when you're not as loved as you love...and that's not good enough for me anymore. They moved on, so will I.

I suppose it's for the best, seeing as I've really started to resent them. I mean, they're both gorgeous and smart and assertive and everybody fucking adores them...and here I am, this plain, shy Asian girl, who is so easily ignorable people don't even fucking realize they're ignoring me...again, not their fault, but how long can I just fucking sit there, basking in their glory, while they and the rest of the world don't even notice I exist? This might sound really self-centered of me, but DAMMIT, I've spent my whole life worrying about what other people think, I think now is the time for ME! ME! ME! Fuck...

So I'm breaking alliances. I'm the US, going heedlessly ahead as my international liaisons crumble. I'm the barnacle floating off the whale, the dislodging brick, I put the ENDE in INDEPENDENTLY MOTIVATED...or whatever.

Metaphorically yours,

X